The “story” is about how the feelings and images surrounding a not-so-good moment or event get recorded in the limbic system of your brain. You make a painful mistake or omission in your daily life and you experience a sense of loss, a serious illness, or a major injury. The emotion: the pain, embarrassment, guilt, horror, regret and resentment and the images of the event get recorded in a folder in your subconscious mind.
The brain continues to store the details of new experiences in folders (my metaphor) consistent with earlier, similar events. The more you see and feel the upset, the stronger the negative emotion gets and the more likely the upset will get repeated. In addition, when a new issue, conflict or negative experience occurs that mimics this earlier, similar event, the emotion in the folder gets stronger and can have more of a negative effect on you in the present moment.
When an upset occurs that mimics the events in the folder, it may trigger the release of the negative energy that has become toxic. This sequence may create an emotional outburst that can outweigh the importance of the event in question. In this case your response is inconsistent with how you want to share the experience…if at all.
I remember a time after having both knees replaced and spending ten days in the hospital with a blood clot in my leg. During this ordeal I experienced a lot of fear as there was about a ten-hour period where I didn’t know what having this blood clot meant. Only that it was serious.
After I was released from the hospital, I felt this huge need to share this experience. I would hear myself sharing this experience and realizing that the emotion was making the people around me and myself uncomfortable. Without realizing it I was adding negative energy to the file called “Unknown Drama.” Finally, a dear friend suggested that I re-write the experience to reflect my gratitude for the excellent medical care I received and the opportunity to create a complete healing and return to a healthy lifestyle.
Go Deep – Gratitude provides the awareness to settle down and discover what you want to have happen with the negative energy before it becomes part of you.
The opportunity to re-write the story is a form of self-reflection that enables you to identify the issue, conflict and/or negative situation and take action to resolve the issue and the associated memories. In short, gratitude provides the awareness of what this situation means to you and what you expect of yourself in this regard.
Go Big – Excitement provides the positive energy to accept the work needed to reframe and release the negative energy associated with the event.
The process for reframing the situation allows you to change the meaning of the event. To discover the positive aspects and real nature of the upset and establish a focus for re-writing the story. Thus re-writing the event allows you to experience the positive effect that this experience has had on your life.
Get Better – Devotion provides the lens/perspective for looking at the situation to learn/apply and get better from the experience. The skills and act of re-writing the story when needed allows you to clear your files and restore your sense of well-being before the negative feelings become toxic.
Keep it Real
There are only two ways to process negative energy that has gotten up into you. Either you write it out or talk it out with someone you trust. For best results you want to write it out and talk it out and repeat the process as much as needed.
Thus, the ability to re-writing a “story” from negative drama to life saving wisdom is well worth the effort needed to embrace the challenges. In some cases, it may seem that the negative, irrational energy has complete charge of the limbic system and the stimulation of the fight or flight response. However, the strength of the human will to breathe and settle down is capable of creating the positive rational energy needed to be in charge of your actions and achieve success and satisfaction… even when you have serious doubt and evidence to the contrary.
In my work with people that have discovered the need to forgive themselves, someone or something that initially seems utterly impossible but somehow, they find a way to GO DEEP, GO BIG AND GET BETTER!
HiLevel Hawaii : Gratitude, Excitement, Devotion
Gratitude: To Go Deep
To breathe, settle down and want to be present with an unpleasant experience.
Excitement: To Go Big
To breathe, express the fire (intensity) and passion for resolving issues, conflicts and negative situations in the best possible way.
Devotion: To Get Better
To breathe, find the lens that allows you to accept and let go of negative thoughts, feelings and actions when it’s in your best interest to do so.